"You can't go." Sarah stated.
"Why not? There is nothing to keep me here." Seth replied, his words bitter.
"I don't want you to go, that's why." Sarah replied, looking at him hopefully. Seth said that he was leaving. Sarah knew that he hardly ever changed his mind once it was made up.
"Don't you get it? I don't care anymore. Not about you, not about this place, nothing. There is absolutely nothing to keep me here in this place. The sooner I leave the better for everyone. Mostly the best for me." Seth carefully cleaned the lenses of his sunglasses and placed them on his nose. His motorcycle was propped on its kickstand beside him, waiting to take him away.
"Is there anything I can say to make you change your mind?" Sarah asked, resigned to the fact that he was leaving.
"No. Nothing. Goodbye Sarah, I did enjoy knowing you. If we ever cross paths again, it will bring me pleasure." Seth mounted his bike and kicked it to life, it's throaty roar silencing further conversation.
Sarah watched Seth ride away.
"Bring me that Horizon," Seth said as he rode away from his life.
2 comments:
Hmmm. Some of the angst was a little...melodramatic? You can get away with blunt words like "I don't care about anything anymore" maybe if you bring a dead tone of voice with it. Also your dialogue tags fell into some teeny conventions. Remember to use 'said' as much as possible. "Stated" and "replied" will distract readers from the dialogue itself.
okay. I will revise!
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